Skimm Money: The “Likeability Trap,” Sick Days, and a Costco Thanksgiving Deal

Get answers straight from the career and finance pros.

On a recent episode of theSkimm's weekly career podcast "9 to 5ish," theSkimm's co-founder and co-CEO Danielle Weisberg spoke with Alicia Menendez about her career in media and how to be a generous leader. Menendez also shared her expert advice for avoiding the likeability trap:

How can I avoid getting caught up in the likeability trap at work?

FEATURED EXPERT:

Alicia Menendez

Anchor of "American Voices with Alicia Menendez" on MSNBC, author of "The Likeability Trap," and host of the podcast "Latina to Latina"

The vast majority of feedback that women get [at work] is critical, subjective feedback. People love to talk to us about how we sit in a chair, how we talk too much with our hands, whether our voice is too high, too low, whatever. And often you get that feedback because someone pulls you aside in the hallway and they tell you. Sometimes, though, you get these pieces of feedback… in a more formal review. There was an executive coach, who I reference in [my] book [“The Likeability Trap”], and what she coaches her clients on is…[to] say, “Thank you so much for that feedback. Can you draw a line for me? From how you perceive my style to how it impacts the results of the work.” 

Now, there's the possibility that the person will be able to connect those dots for you, right? [They might say], “I know that you pride yourself on being deliberative, but sometimes that shows up as indecision. Just last week you were tinkering with the fonts on the deck and it meant we were 24 hours late in delivering it to the client.” OK, that is actual feedback that you can then go back and employ in your day-to-day work. A lot of the time, when you push back and ask someone to connect their feedback on your style to the actual results of your work, they got nothing, and so it kind of kicks them back on their heels and forces them to think about whether or not they would say that to someone else.

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The median net worth of Black households in the US has increased 60% since 2019...

But it’s still the lowest among groups surveyed by the Federal Reserve. 

Employees are taking more sick days...

And employers aren’t thrilled about it.

If you’re banking on an inheritance from an aging relative… 

Spoiler: Don’t count on it.

A fully prepped Thanksgiving dinner for eight for $199.99?

Thanks, Costco.

 The items celebs and influencers think are worth the big bucks.

Investing in art goes beyond the monetary value of the work. It’s also about the emotional value you hold as the owner. This week, Madison Utendahl, the founder and creative director of the design studio Utendahl Creative, tells us about how a print she recently purchased for her apartment speaks to her views on art, pop culture, and inclusivity.

Tell us about a recent investment purchase. 

A limited-edition Slim Aarons Lyford Cay Fire Service, 1966, print, on auction.

How much did you spend on it? 

$3,000.

Why do you consider it a good investment? 

It is one of the very few images Slim Aarons captured of Black people, and I felt it was super important that the owner of this rarity be a Black person, ie: myself. Slim Aarons is widely idolized throughout pop culture, and the art world, as someone who represented an era of “glamor.” However, what is often overlooked is how frequently he overlooked highlighting non-white subjects and their experiences during that same, highly prejudiced period.

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